I’m such a failure…actually I’m not doing too bad but yesterday felt like a failure. I needed to go grocery shopping yesterday and I took the one and only, BOWDY! LOL! I figured we would just hit McDonald’s on our way home and I would get the lowest calorie meal and all would be good and I’d drink my protein shake for supper…NONE OF THAT HAPPENED! He picked Pizza Hut and it just so happened that they were having their buffet…oh goodness and it actually looked pretty good. I decided on a salad with limited toppings and no croutons. I had a little bit of egg on it, sunflower seeds, cheese and a glop of french dressing and a spoonful of cottage cheese on the side. Easy enough, I just traded my usual stuff for healthier stuff and limited the portions. Then it came time for main course and I chose a half a slice of sausage and sweet onion pizza and a half slice of chicken supreme pizza and a small spoonful of the chicken alfredo type pasta that I LOVE and one small breadstick. (Which if you’ve seen their buffet breadsticks, they’re like a fourth of the size of a regular breadstick) So I guess I did all right because I typed it all into my fitness pal and it was only 550 calories. Oh, I forgot to mention that I only drank water with lemon too. So then I’m on my way home, trucking along after shopping and my mom calls and we made plans to have dinner with her, my dad, and my littlest brother last night. So I figured I could choose a healthy option if we went out to eat…NOT! She brought home 2 Casey’s pizzas…a meat galore and a bacon cheeseburger (my fave). I looked it up on My Fitness Pal and one piece was 500+ calories! Can I get a WHAT!?! Anyways, I still had 1200 calories to use up according to my app so I went ahead and ate 2 pieces, guiltily I might add.
Today I woke up with the guilt of yesterday fresh on my mind and I had decided that my will power would be back. So Tim asked me the famous “What’s for breakfast” question as soon as we got up and I figured since it was Saturday and it was fairly early that I’d fix them all a big breakfast. I made biscuits, sausage patties and fried eggs. I looove sausage patties and can rarely turn them up. I made smaller patties today and when I gave Albany her half, Bowdy turned down the other half so I ate it…dont freak out…it was smaller than a half dollar to start with! I am proud to announce though that while my family ate this meal that would normally be one of my favorites, I sipped down my protein shake and water. Way to go will power!!! Today for the kids’ lunch I fixed them a ham salad sandwich, pickles, cottage cheese, and pretzel sticks. It was so tempting because it didnt look like there was much ham salad left so I decided to make myself a half sandwich with what was left….WRONG AGAIN! There was a full sandwich worth of ham salad left so I ate that for lunch. I must be in a state of denial because I have yet to enter it into My Fitness Pal…I will though and I’m thinking I should just feed the kids something for supper that will absolutely not tempt me and I’ll drink my shake. That way I’ll feel less guilty.
Oh goodness, it feels good to get all that off my chest. I was feeling so guilty about it but putting it all out there doesnt seem too bad…that and the fact that I shoveled snow yesterday for an hour and my body aches today reminds me that I did do something physically strenuous yesterday and I got my heart rate up and working so I burned off alot of those calories. My head is saying “Relax momma. You’re going to be fine. One day of small slip ups isnt going to kill you or ruin your progress this far. You are fine, fresh, and fierce and you can do this!”
So do this I will…I’m off to do some steppin on the Wii fit game!!!