What they dont tell you…
I’m having a particularly sad night. I’m going to be totally honest with you and state that I’ve had a particularly bad anxiety attack brought on by stress and family dynamics. After fighting for over an hour with my feelings and emotions, I’m proud to say that I didnt binge eat away my grief and anxiety. I picked myself up off the floor (literally), decided to be stronger than this anxiety and the triggers that exacerbate it, and pulled together a healthy balanced menu for dinner and ate even when my tummy was still uneasy.
Now that you’ve read about my victory over the foods that used to defeat me, let me explain the title a little bit. There are so many great things people tell you about losing weight. How great you’ll feel after the weight is off. All the things you can do now. All the cute clothes you can fit into. All the happiness it brings. What they dont tell you are some of these scary and sad things I’ve experienced lately like hair loss, fatigue, and low blood pressure.
As of right now, I have lost 46 lbs and about 600 hairs down the shower drain. LOL! No seriously, my hair is coming out in clumps now and today it really alarmed me. I have been growing my dark brown hair for about 3 years now to finally get it to the length that it is now and it’s almost between my shoulder blades down my back. When I kept getting handfuls and handfuls out while working my conditioner in today, I started to freak out a little bit. Was I going bald? Was I going to have to get my hair cut short so people wouldnt notice? Was I going to have to wear wigs…hat? Oh my gosh, I look horrid in hats! All of those thoughts flooded my brain today. I talked to Tim a little about it and he said “Surely it’ll balance out” Then I texted my friend Lori for some moral support and to convince me not to cut my hair off. LOL! So I went to my trusty friend, Google and found this: http://www.escapefromobesity.net/2010/11/losing-weight-hair-loss.html She said that this kind of hair loss called telogen effluvian. After more research I learned that basically my body is in shock and going into “shut down” mode. It’s cutting off all of the “elective” processes and apparently growing hair is one of those. LOL! Once things balance out and get back in order internally, my hair should come back in those follicles that it fell out of. I also read that dropping your calorie intake as drastically as I did can wreak havoc on your hair too. So that was more comforting. I decided to think of other things and ride out the waves for the next few months and also up my vitamins. HA!
Another thing people dont say that have lost weight is how drastically you blood pressure drops. My bp used to run 130/80 or so and was never a concern about it being high by no means. Well, about a month ago, my bp was 102/60 which is extremely low compared to what it used to run. With that low number comes dizziness and extreme fatigue. I’m so tired some days, I can barely keep my eyes open and I take regular naps, sadly. When I stand up, I have to take a minute and breath. When I get out of bed in the morning, I have to sit for a while as I swing my legs off the bed and wait for it to level out. When I get out of the car, I have to stand a while before taking off towards my destination. When I go up or down stairs, I have to pause at the bottom or top and wait for the world to stop spinning. Fortunately, I am aware of this and take a minute to pull myself together before going about my business. I researched this too and it’ll balance itself out after a few months as well. In the meantime, I’m going to be easy on my body and not overwork it and take things slow when I work out. I definitely need the cardio but I’m not going to be sprinting anytime soon. I think it’s safe to say, the leisurely jog is more my speed. Turtle POWER! LOL!
Hopefully if you’re trying to lose weight and find yourself battling any of these demons, you’ll at least be prepared for them and know that you’re not alone. I felt so isolated and scared of the unknown but I’m thankful that I have resources at my fingertips and that other people have been here too and shared about it. Aside from these little blips, I am so proud of how far I’ve come and I’m keeping on keeping on!