He saved me!
I’m sure some of you might know it but I’m a highly spiritual person and that I believe nothing is coincidence. I feel that God’s plan is always in place and He knows exactly what is going to happen. I have had numerous experience where He is clearly very present in my life.
With all that said, I want to give a little visual of how my morning went. I made excuse after excuse and ended up sleeping in past my workout time. I could tell Tim was irritated with me because he likes to spend a little time with me in the morning too and I blew all that off today (and the entire week for that matter). But then when I did get up I headed upstairs to wake the kids, opened Bowdy’s pants drawer and they were all in disarray. He clearly didn’t put them away nicely. So instead if waking him with my chipper mom tone, I grumped at him about the state of his drawers. Then I went to wake Albany and she wouldn’t budge. Mind you, I’ve been having trouble getting them up lately do I put them to bed at 7:00 pm last night and she was still awake at 8:40! So I was grumpy that she was still exhausted despite my efforts. So I grumbled my way down the stairs and fixed Albany’s lunch like usual, flopped down and zoned out to my phone. Not too long after, they both come in babbling and bickering up and storm and I just get grumpier and grumpier. I gave several lectures this morning and even yelled at Albany for being ugly to Bowdy as they walked out the door. So immediately after, I snuggled back into bed and decided to sleep off my grumpiness and try to forget about the bad morning.
I had been in bed playing on my phone for about 30 minutes and in that time, I get a text and a private message on Facebook inviting me to do something today. These are the low moments when I used to feel terribly isolated and I feel like God used those invited to shake that isolation away. I mean how often do people get 2 invites in one day!?! So I still ignored this a bit and started messing on Facebook again and bam! A video with a song mashup of 2015 was on my feed so I decided to watch it through all the way. By the last minute, I was feeling motivated to workout. To feel the thump in my ears from my headphones. To feel the pulse in my temples from my heartbeat. To feel the rower handles in my hands and to feel the burn in my biceps. I have never actually HAD the urge or yearn to workout. I usually go into autopilot mode and make myself do it. I opened my curtains to feel some sunshine and see this:
I literally gasped and said “oh wow” out loud when I saw it. It’s so beautiful with the sunshine and the frost! I knew exactly what I was supposed to do. So I put on my workout clothes and headed upstairs. The first song on pandora playing was The Writer by Ellie Goulding. It’s an amazing song that I’ve always loved but today it had even more meaning.
When I heard the lyrics they just soaked into my being. I knew I needed God’s help today or else I was quickly headed down a slippery slope straight into the black hole that I used to spend hours and days and weeks wallowing in. God truly saved me today.